new low.... made out with someone while peeing
It's not true, it's not true! She's too full of cheese to have sexy time!
No. untill you have done a puke that contains nothing but semen and tequila, you do not 'feel my pain'
So it turns out my dad calls his penis "John" which means he either named me after his penis or his penis after me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
lets grab drinks (in a friendly, not super awkward because ive eaten your ass kind of way) sometime soon
wow.
We just had a sexually tense moment where we both chose the trough the pee. I love gay clubs.
Apparently "dick me" was not the response he was looking for.
What happened to my face?
You kneed yourself in the eye during the Harlem Shake.
It was impressive.
When have we listened to the rational side of either of us?!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's 2pm, and I just had to pass a guy in the turning lane because he was driving down Main Street in an electric wheelchair pulling a flatbed trailer with 2 of his buddies in it and they were all drunk holding beers.
It's taking every bit of my restraint not to go to the store and buy chips and cake and like steal someone's dog. PMS is so weird.
I think it's important to not involve Bar Food in any near future decisions.
Reading becomes significantly more difficult when people are having crazy loud sex in an adjoining room
come pick your gf up from my house. she's sitting in the fridge and hissing at the cat to let her eat the potatoes. btw i dont have a cat
He just took off his shirt. I'll text you later.
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