worst experience of my life. her nipples were sick. kinda like a venn diagram
You want to go to a white party at LAX
Clubs are lame especially themed ones. Im not in a fucking episode of laguna beach
great, thanks for announcing that I gave you head over twitter
at least I said it was good
Dont even try and act like it wasn't you who made the sex tape of my dogs.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
After walking in on us in the living room, he still insisted that he slept in my bed with me afterwards.
I'm not gonna lie. having my legs shaved for me in the morning was a lovely surprise.
Just woke up to my stoned boyfriend building a shrine around my bare ass. He'll never leave me.
Well Its not like I planned having my potato launcher explode and burn off my eyebrow and eye lashes.. I still have my right eyebrow can't u just be happy?
Just peed out a window, not entirely sure it's open. Can't tell. I'll find out in the morning.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My new hobby is moving his stuff to random places in the house. Good luck making a smoothing at 6:30 in the morning, the blender top's in the dog food container
You have amazing self restraint. If there was one thing I could learn from you, that wouldn't be it. I love my life as it is.
You casually put your finger in my ass and other people are weird..
Wtf. So apparently this 5 star establishment doesn't allow strip putt putt in the parking lot. We all just got kicked out of our rooms.
Be there in 6 mins I’m smell like fireball. and strippers and need to use your showers before go home
All i want from a relationship is to get drunk watch pirates of the Caribbean and have sex
Randomize