i just made an omelette with the cheese and ham from a lunchables. and ketchup packets
julia child would be proud.
All I've accomplished this quarter is making Uno an acceptable drinking game.
No. one of us needs a degree and I am already the alcoholic friend. I can't do everything
we couldn't afford a big pool so we bought 2 kiddie pools and put the inflatable beer pong table inbetween. get over here. now.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You were peeing on yourself thinking it was the sprinkler in your yard
Im going home to examine my vagina with a hand mirror. wish me luck.
You kept hugging the big bouncer & feeling the other ones beard
Maybe I should forgo underwear.
This is a family BBQ no?
they won't let me drive with my sombrero
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
this weekend destroyed me...my brain feels like the curly fry at the bottom of the bag. GAhhh come save me
that's ecstasy for ya. now I'm kinda in the mood for jack in the box.
I realized I used a copy of a biography of JFK as pillow last night...
Happy Fourth.
She really has to stop the coke at some point. Won't she run out of money eventually?
Won't she run out of nose eventually?
He doesn't deserve you. Your ass looks 8 times better than his face ever will. Wanna order pizza and watch porn?
I fell into a police barricade, a cop helped me up and asked if I've been drinking. I just looked at him and said "dude.." He proceeded to take out his handcuffs
you tried to fight the cop who was busting the party, you said you had a constitutional right to do a keg stand...
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