btw, but what hole was i in last night? wanna know if i have to worry
dude why did you let me call her?!
i told you it was a bad idea and to quote you exactly, you said "no, it's a good idea..that's what people do when they love each other." you met her 15 minutes prior to that conversation...
So I tried to call my phone from his phone and was like, "hey, my name is not in here..I thought you had my number" turns out he has my number saved as "gives good head"
so I got guilt tripped into giving her a new years kiss, and she proceeded to try and eat my face while mounting me. when you give a mouse a cookie...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
CANT TOUCH THIS JUST CAME ON MY IPOD. LOVE STEVE JOBS
i think you broke pat's ankle when you drove over it... he's freaking out but on a more serious note i'm 99% sure i saw a werewolf
It was a legit night tell he threw a snowball in the bar, thats when I knew it was time to go to the next bar.
Is it bad that i wanna bang this girl ONLY because she looks like my cousin?
Doors open. I'm laying in bed watching caddy shack and drinking a vodka tonic.
And I'm out of vodka so bring vodka or 2013 will blow ass
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Thats alot of pressure.
Just on your vagina. BTW I'm passing your house.
You slid down a wall, tried to pull your cast off and yelled that casts were too conformist.
You started crawling towards a moving train. Maybe you should take it easy next time
Will you be super villain lesbian lovers with me for halloween?
I swear if you laugh while im moaning i will immediately stop and go home.
If by whore you mean UPGRADE....then yes I am
Randomize