rubbing her clit was like playing thumb war
It's all fun and games until the last slice of pizza gets bong water spilled on it.
How was the bike ride?
Nope. High in the basement. Fruit cups.
Condom broke. Took her to CVS for plan B and parked in expectant mothers spot. I laughed.. she cried
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Oh god. There is a bite mark in the bar of soap. Please tell me I was not that wasted.
Heed the warning of the ghost of Oktoberfest present: German beer is soooooooo much better than our watered down children's piss. also lost all my clothes and am wearing lederhosen the rest of the trip.
Either I'm tripping balls or my dog has super powers.
I woke up naked on his boat with a cowboy hat on with a boat cover over me... Thank you tequila!
So I went tanning and I burned my boobs.
They're like sad pomegranates.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Apparently after I threw up I put my socks in the toilet......
LOVE ME MORE THAN PIZZA CAN
I love you. I would never turn you into a bear.
It seems I've entered my 21st birthday the same way I entered this world: naked, crying and smothered in someone else's bodily fluids...
Im sitting on the floor of the hotel room eating nachos and drinking coffee. People should learn to embrace their hangovers
I just bought a bottle of dried bees on Etsy. I am the wrong person to talk you out of this.
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