just wrote on a church. and then stalked a boy, by the way, i fucked him. him being your friend, also, love tacos.
she uses ice cubes and hums anything I want. Last night was Welcome to the jungle. it wasnt lost on me shes a puma. no shame in that 30+ game.
hey can i play with your boom stick tonite? I'll let you shoot the love of jesus in my face.
come over
How do you not remember seeing the kid from our chem lab table and repeatedly yelling "lab partners for life!" at him?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Remember me drinking the vodka from in between your legs?
I woke up and he was just feeling up my stomach. I felt like buddha and he was rubbing my belly for good luck. never again.
I found your dog. Now we are bros, so he is staying. Don't call, don't make it weird.
I accidentally called my professor daddy...and I think he liked it. Help, I'm scared.
I can't help you right now because I'm shaving my feet...like a lady.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I wanted to say "you're a souless cunt" but in a nice way. So I added a smiley face.
He was semi blacked out in the hallway with a bucket, calling for me while I had sex with his best friend in the very next room. Why do you let me do these things?
Hey now one little girl thought it was cool I was covered in blood. Apparently according to her Mom she wants to be a surgeon when she grows up
I fell out of my bed whilst trying not to move this morning. I AM ADULT
I had ice cream for breakfast two days in a row.
SUPER ADULTS
According to my bank account I spent a penny some where
He wouldn’t know a good thing if it bit him on the ass. Which, btw, I did.
Randomize