watching a depressing episode of spongebob while high is the most depressing thing i have ever experienced
i'm writing my speech about my 4th grade backstreet boy concert experience. that sums up how seriously i take my life.
She told me to stay away from him cause apparently he fucks anything that walks. clearly i responded with..."i walk"
He introduced himself to me as "the gayest gay who ever gayed." I like him already.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I wore my front clasp bra so he would have to prove his sobriety to me before we had sex.
I don't want to talk. I just want to motorboat those tits
Yes, you can 69 in a fiat. But I think I have permanent nerve damage
Didn't know what to wear so I ripped off my bed sheets and tied myself a toga. "a little hungover" is no way to describe me right now.
That one dude should feel honored if he were to get herpes from you. Fuck that Guy. He is a herpe.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He gave me the "find somebody who wants to date you for who you are" speech while I walked around the house asking people for pants.
Like, I can't stand that bitch, but i genuinely hope she gets the help she needs
Cover your peen. We're going out.
Well the cops were called after the kid fell, but we saw 4 cute guys from our window while it was going down, so it wasn't all that bad.
THREE MINUTES! THREE MINUTES PAST MIDNIGHT I STSRT HEARING CHRISTMAS MUSIC ON THE OVERHEAD PA SYSTEM!!!
Divorce can be hard, but look on the bright side. Your soon to be ex raved about your dick and I’m great with hard things ;-)
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