My brain says no but my pants say off.
I'm gonna write a book, Things that go bump in the night: The story of Katelyn. Chapter one, my roommate is a dumb whore.
his internet history is a lot of porn, how to make a hovercraft and side-effects of jacking off too much
Have you ever seen a midget fist pump? BEST. THING. EVERRRRR.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
How do I tell my mom that she just went to the gym with my water bottle filled with vodka...
He texted me for drugs this time. Not sex. I dunno if I should be pleased it's not sex or disappointed that I come across as a druggie
Come outside. The vendor wants to go out strong tonight! Russian hooker interviews. Don't ask. We leave in 3 minutes.
Everything tastes like hotdogs and shame.
I walked in and saw him spread eagle on the couch beatin it, while he just pet the dog that sat there and stared. mom was pissed
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
also, I heard you can donate your eggs for like $8gs....hellloooo mediterranean vacation. thank youuuu future babies!!!
I need to establish a pattern of dominance early.... I'm like a slutty Cesar Milan
He told me he was married and then fingered me on the kitchen counter. It was awkward to explaining the broken toaster to my roommates this morning...
I had sex with him for the first time drunk, dressed in a toddler overall tutu costume, at 2pm. Horrible start.
So...I maybe walked across campus last night with my life size Joe Biden cut out.
I couldn’t resist. He had a camouflage condom. You know I love a man in a uniform
Randomize