I'm drunk in f*****g wisconsin and want to kill myself.
If it's any consolation, be grateful that you're not in New Jersey.
Maybe he just has a boisterous penis
If I banged a coworker last night but didn't enjoy it can I put it down on my timesheet?
oh my god its dad's weekend for the sororities i can't wait to throw up in front of all these parents
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She opened a beer bottle with her armpit and then gave me a cigarette from the waistband of her underwear. I dont know if I want to be her or marry her.
On the bright side since it was a Tuesday you weren't even in jail for the long! that could've been worse!
Were playing bathroom attendees at the party and making people wash their hands
i made a dollar
I just keep sniffing it hoping for an explanation.
found a hand written recpiet for 'one doe fawn' on an open crate in my living room need help to find it
where the hell would u of bought a deer
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I am going to wait until he wakes up to set his couch on fire and then pee it out. That way he knows it was not an accident.
Unless your apartment has 3 am pancakes Im not coming over.
Why can't people give useful wedding gifts...like sex swings or Nutella?
Bar selfie Saturday turned into bar nudie Saturday in a hurry. I need to delete my snapchat...
You just kept screaming "COME GET ME OFFICER, MY ALLIGATOR MEANS BUSINESS" while swinging a beanie baby alligator at him.
I told him. He hasn't said anything. Crying and holding cats is probably what is happening.
Randomize