Hey when I die alone will you come by often enough so that my cats don’t eat my face?
Please tell me its not ok to love a 17 year old....no matter how hot he is and how sexy his eyebrow ring is oh lord
Yeah. My legs are trembling...hard to walk. Feels like a neon arrow is pointing at me saying "just had sex (with not his wife)"
what was i supposed to do!? wake up and actually ask her name??
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was in a threesome last night that turned into a violent domestic dispute with damage to a hotel. Wish you were there!
just found out my horoscope sign is scales. it's like i was destined to be a drug dealer
All I remember is yelling RUN as fireworks started going off in the kitchen. Who said that was a bad idea?
I made weed fried chicken. What have you done today?
More or less binge drinking as a giant grape seemed justified
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
dude when im high using logic is an accomplishment that should be rewarded. make sure u get cinnamon twists
He screamed AMERICA, took a shot of vodka out of a Tupperware container, and then asked if he could see my tits
i looked down and was like "oh shit thats blood" then it was like "shit, thats not my blood." then it was like whos blood is this??
All I know is I got on a table at late night and sang gotta go my own way
I know. His dick was small at the top and got bigger at the bottom, like a fucking curling wand.
Just had a threesome for the second time in my life. I don;t even enjoy threesomes. Too much effort.
HOW DO THESE THINGS KEEP HAPPENING TO YOU?
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