Until that no good dick sucking whore stays away from my boyfriend I am gonna start blowing all of his friends...
Two portable blenders. We are going to be popular and dangerous.
Dude the animal human society told us we could get a dog when we came back sober. I cant wait.
Like lay upon bear skin rugs, drink brandy and reminisce of the yesteryear's before a majestic fire place? Because those are my plans.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
oh my god, just saw a man throw up in a trashcan and blood came out of his nose. HES GETTING ON MY BUS. HES SITTING ACROSS FROM ME. FUCK.
The van in front of me contains people having SEX. I am in full view of a SEX VAN.
I've been drinking vodka for the last 12 hours at the beach and can't see straight and have awesome hair.
LIFE IS #1 SOMETIMES
It's going to be weird as hell when you have kids. I'll meet them and think "Hi, Did you know that I was almost your dad?"
I was watching porn and wanted to change the tab to another video to cum but I clicked the wrong tab and it was a gif of a dog but I was coming and couldn't do anything so did I jill off to a dog? I feel like I should be guilty
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
After that time I came to the conclusion that jeeps are the best cars to have sex in
Check snapchat. Selfie game still on point mid vomit.
Nothing says hey I wanna be your friend again like ambushing me with a dick pic
Is kiddo a correct name to call someone who you stuck your dick in?
leads to pukin, then cryin, then 24hr masturbatin binge, then cryin again and finally a combination of all 3
It’s Sunday Funday! Stop watching football and bring your penis over here. There will be plenty of scoring!
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