Proposition. Sex. No words, no talking about it later. I just want you tonight.
Sorry I never got back to you. I got high. I know it sounds like a commercial or something... but its true
they told me they were banning four lokos so yeah i did have to buy 42 of them
By the way, i got bored and just started putting my balls on every object in your room. One at a time.
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yeah they are definitely having sex in that car. joe just yelled through the window telling them to do the "titanic hand print thing"
Please do not make a facebook page for my hickeys.
He drew a bath for me. It was only cute until he started throwing in celery and calling me soup.
All in all only spent $2 at the bar ln... Fucking love having a vagina
I was on all fours trying to empty the bowl we smoked into the sewer when your neighbor came out, but besides that it went smoothly
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Something must have happened, they started yelling truffle butter and you said we needed to leave NOW
I got stabbed with a couple of chip crumbs during sex Saturday. Further proof I need to stop eating snacks in bed
I'm waiting for your stupid pizza and this 400 lb drunk man is behind me singing the acapella version of Elevation by U2
You know it's time to call it a night when every guy in the bar (all 3 of them) have seen you naked at one time or another.
I wanna riverboat gamble on your vaginal waters. Just sayin
I wonder how vigorously I can jack off in a one person tent without being noticed???
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