i hope you realize when i said "grib" earlier i was referring to the gridded binary, a mathematically concise data format commonly used in meteorology to store historical weather forecast data. also meant in referential conjunction to my probability math class that i am failing at roughly 215pm tomorrow afternoon.
it wasnt like "sexy" or whatever. like...she was smiling just standing there butt ass naked
tasteful.
Lowest moment of my life just occurred. I literally threw up all over myself in front of my parents.
There was a picture of him proposing on the night stand and their dog watched, but I can't help myself, his dick is just so perfect.
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The last thing I remember is him grabbing my ass and telling me he knew where the jello shots were, so I followed him.
So my niece decided to play "lets make shapes out of your bruises" with me and told me that one of them looks like a shark bite. Bravo, sir. Bravo.
If our text convos ever saw the light of day lives would be in tatters
I was wondering how I got the burn marks on my boobs and then I remembered....
The baked potato bra?
So we stayed at his mom's and all got drunk and he and I hooked up in his old bedroom. Then his drunk mom came in and tackled us when we were still naked. Why does this keep happening to me?
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she walked in on me throwing up in the sink with my pants around my ankles and I said "i'll be with you in a sec"
Just found some confetti on my nipple if that's any indicator of how the night went
look for me at the Giants game I will possibly be the drunk girl passed out by 2nd
The car smells like weed is an understatement.
My husband found the cock ring I bought my FWB. I told him it was napkin holder and he believed me. And that’s why I need a side dick
The school better be open next year. I’ve been FB stalking Dads of my incoming students and there’s serious DILFage in this class! Maybe 2020 will turn around!
It’s 2020. You’ll probably get knocked up. If you’re really lucky you’ll just get the clap
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