I'm dying. Please wear something slutty to my funeral.
Is it sad I memorized the exact change required for a #7 at Wendy's?
i went to toss her salad and she had a toilet paper clinger on one of the hairs
when she said she would show you her other bow, she ment she wanted you to bend her over and see the tattoo on her lower back you idiot
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't think blacking out in class is a good idea. But I'm game
i want to swaddle you in tequila
I was fingering her, she was moaning, and we were singing Mulan
Also, that dude projectile vomiting all over the living room was the perfect distraction for me to swipe the booze and run.
We went to IKEA super baked wearing fake mustaches. You?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This little shit keeps eating the playdoh so i replaced the green with wasabi from work. Wonder what his parents are gonna think when he burns his soft palette?
It sounds like I am drunk, but I am not. I just have a concussion.
I'm hoping you were seen by someone holding a frozen turkey at 230 in the morning
SOME BITCH AT THE HOSTEL STOLE MY NUT BUTTER THERE WILL BE BLOOD
On another note- any interest in going to a gay bar to hit on 19yr olds?
just saw those girls we met the other night. i happen to be wearing a bunny suit and driving your smart car. i think its safe to say thats a no go situation.
Randomize