She just got back from rehab. You dont celebrate that with margaritas.
We just got home. I got some malt liqour and a lottery ticket so I'm really doing a lot with my life right now
How do i write this on his wall without making it sound like he gave me an std?
i think the beer goggles wore off after hearing the story of her 2nd abortion
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I swear, its like my old fuck buddies have a 6th sense for when I'm going to be daydrunk. Then they start texting me. And then I start sexting them
I can only get completely wasted and hungry two more times and then we're out of fritos.
I am lonely and I want to touch your beard
red lips, whiskey sips, shaking hips, nipple slips. my life as a rap song.
That kid i sell weed to just had his mom give him a ride over here she waited in the car while he bought a bag
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have his gate key so know he has to see me again.
So... Sex in my rain boots last night. Trashy or a great show of character?
If it was with a guy, trashy. Sex with a girl is never trashy.
Neighbor is sitting on his porch looking like he made some terrible life decisions and I just want to be like "I drank half of a handle of peach vodka in a shed last night. I understand" but I think they're swingers so his night probs sucked more.
Why don’t they have healthy alcohol yet?
They call you PBJ boy because you were trying to seduce me with pieces of a peanut butter and jelly sandwich. Successfully might I add.
How many weight watcher activity points do you think sex is worth?
Randomize