he said i'm too pretty to suck penis
He's really hot. I think he's gonna be my reason to shave this winter.
I heard him crying and I heard him listening to porn... I'm hoping to God they weren't at the same time.
He told me the color of his piss. Worst. First date. Ever.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Can I color on your dick again?
Just got outta the drunk tank! Happy 21st birthday!
We fed him just...so many bright colored crayons when he was blacked out. I hope he looks at his shits because this could be all for nothing
Remember that mom/daughter stripper team? Well i just met the ex husband/father in AA. WOW!!!! WOW....
I feel like it could help stop wars and begin world peace and the continents can unite for one Monday because chicken fries come back today
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I gave him a bj as a thank you for helping. I think that's good.
Well I'm over here squandering a fabulous hair day and radiant complexion
How’s the date going?? Do you think he’s gonna cut your face off and wear it to his birthday party?
Tequila. The ruiner of all good intentions.
When they said they were gonna tattoo each other's gamer tags on their asses, I knew I no longer had a boyfriend.
Stop trying to mix nacho cheese and sex. Guys don’t want hot cheese near their junk. Pick a better fetish
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