just woke up to a 10 min voicemail of you singing "99 red ballons".... you need to work on your german..
Using what I learned in my global terrorism class last semester to sneak booze onto my cruise. thanks college.
Now they're talking about doing whiskey shots since they're flipping the turkey over. You might need to drive me home.
You were yelling in my ear let's double team her with her right next to us
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was carrying him baywatch style into my place because he passed out.
Precisely. She's an awesome drinking companion; yet, not so awesome mother-in-law material.
Shot gunning beers for breakfast. You better be ready for today.
Out of all the people in the house to show their tits at mcdonalds to try and get free food, they picked those two?
I've been drinking vodka for the last 12 hours at the beach and can't see straight and have awesome hair.
LIFE IS #1 SOMETIMES
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Crazy fun. I think I got a concussion from a stripper
His grandma held his dogs so they wouldn't follow me out the door. It was like a whole new level added to my walk of shame.
WHY DID I MAKE A 7 minute video of me eating crackers and cheese when I was high
Send it to me
Rum and your dick are involved. You're relying on the unreliable narrator.
And god said thou shalt never deny free booze. And it was good.
Its like my group of friends and I are all dating and we're all just a bunch of Swingers, is that normal?
Randomize