He quoted an N'sync song to confess his attraction to me. Needless to say, I had sex with him.
Her vagina should come with caution tape.
i wonder what thom yorke's orgasms sound like
she must wash her vagina with a dirtier vagina
not sure what i find more disconcerting, your text or the fact that i recognized that as a dane cook quote
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I woke up this morning with 2 australian chicks passed out in my living room, a whole bunch of coke on my kitchen counter and I have no idea how the fuck either thing got there
I couldn't tell if those girls from the bar were lesbians or just awesome
He's the equivalent of a body pillow and a dildo. But still funny. We have good pillow talk.
I've got my laundry in the car, tonights 1 night stand pre-req is an in suite washer and dryer. Let's do this!
I consider it a good night. I met Jimmy Buffet, who grabbed my ass, and I body-checked a toddler. She had it coming.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think I ate my cheesy fiesta potatoes cup.
HIS BALLS ARE HEAVEN SENT FROM THE VELVET ANGLES.
I love that you'd blow off your high school reunion to get shit faced in an aquarium with us
Um. We all know how I feel about sea life
Your cock has been in the back of my throat. Co-worker is no longer a sufficient title. Fix that shit ASAP
He looks like an accountant with a secret kinky candy filled center.
Oh hello Jordan's parents, I'm here to have sex with your son. He's in the shower? Oh great, I'll join him
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