Packed at 6 am completely wasted. Damage assessment: 12 pairs of socks (no underwear), a flashlight, 3 shorts, shot glass, 8 sweaters, puff paint, one sneaker.
Its only tuesday and I need a dd home from work. This is getting too easy.
She fucked me for a ride to the airport. If this is what the rest of college is like, I'm never graduating.
Snorting lines of xanex off the back of my grandparents toilet before church. Thinking of u.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I can't believe he let me cut his hair as stoned as I was.. I think I even cut my own hair too
I'm dealing with this like an adult, cupcakes and beer.
cassie wtf are you alive??! no one has seen you for like seven hours whereeee did you go
IS IT POSSIBLE FOR A GUY TO NOT HAVE BALLS
Currently at a fetish club with a set of swings (don't ask). Having flashbacks to the park by my house
that's the second time I've made out with him and woken up with my pants stuffed with PBRs I am convinced he's magic
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I totally have a huge crush on him though which is fucking up my "classy she-demon with limited feelings" vibe
You then played what you called "a smooth jazz rendition of talk dirty to me" all thrusting your crotch at the bartender. Mom looked horrified, but my dad couldn't stop laughing
First day back to class and I have already pulled out the hard liquor
She asked what the dent on the hood of my car was from..i think she knows we had sex up there
I googled my name and pictures of you drinking showed up. Way to steal my thunder....
Let’s not dwell on the negatives. I have a fat ass and suck dick well.
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