My roommate still talks on AIM. What is this middle school?
Professor used "ROFL" while grading my paper... Do I even go to a real college?
ISS teacher has a tramp stamp.
Shotgun.
Life lesson: When you compete in an impromptu "bloody mary chug-off," in the end, no one wins.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It was pretty bad. Like cum-on-my-face-while-singing-Let-It-Snow bad.
Dude I wanna go on a booze cruise
Dude our life is a booze cruise
But without boats...
Also, if you all get arrested i'm coming to laugh at you because i don't have the money for bail.
I'm going to pound you from behind over a table at the bar while I pull your hair and call you a whore...please pass along that message to Rob
Downside to Halloween: you can't tell if the guy dressed as Gene Simmons from KISS that keeps flirting with you is hot or not...I decided to err on the side of caution and assume not...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I never thought I would have to get vodka suctioned out of my ear
I made a wizard staff out of Keystone light... I am therefore the smoothest wizard in all of our university's history.
I was cracking open beer cans, throwing them off the roof, and yelling "FRAG OUT!"
No one will ever find true happiness until they have gotten stoned and taken off the bra they've been wearing all day.
You, my dear friend, are a poet of the deep mental longings of women worldwide.
We had everything under control until this one jackass fucked up. Thanks, Peter.
I love you. You know I enjoy the constant sex noises
Randomize