I was found on the hood of someone elses car... Who would've thought there were 2 white nissans?
they were just spraying pledge on themselves and calling it lemon cologne.
It's like God knew that was my ex's best friend and punished me. I've never vomited that much in my life.
He used one end of the towel to wipe the cum and I used the other end to wipe the tears
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just curious... Do you still have the cocks bracelet? You know, the one we pass around to whoevers been the biggest slut recently?
3 guesses about who had to still-drunkenly facilitate a fire drill at 2:40am because freshmen can't handle microwave popcorn.
I can't wait for the day Google doesn't remind me that I got arrested for having 3 shots called 'frog cum' lined up in front of me.
Well when you get back to your computer, there's a nice explanation of pansexuality on your Skype.
They need 20 oz Capri suns with liquor. Douches need to grow up with their clients
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oh I will totally be your beard, but on one condition I get to watch you and your boy friend have sex.
The Universe is CLEARLY playing a bad joke on your sex life
I woke up with my panties in the cat food dish, and everything covered in honey and bruises.
I swear to the sweet baby jesus I didn't fill your freezer with salsa and my little pony toys, but I didn't stop them either.
I cant believe you made me read bad furry sexts
my boobs just made me lose a game of beer pong. the balls hit them, bounced off and into the cup. twice. ive never been so disappointed in them.
Randomize