some girl had on jean underwear. i hate america.
Just had a girl agree to give me a blowjob in exchange for wearing my jacket during class. Talk about successful negotiations. Best day of my life
I found a vibrator in my car and it's not mine...this is becoming a weird day.
HOW DID U BEAT A GAY GUY IN GAY CHICKEN?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the theme of the baby shower is Nightmare On Prego Street
i wont go near him until the smell goes away , and he takes the chex mix box off his head.
Im about to have a threesome, Ill pay you twenty bucks to go clean my room. Just throw it all in the closet.
I gotta stop tellin complete strangers at the bar that they're the godparents to my first born
my knee is completely bruised from kneesliding into the bowling ball. bowling for creativity points was a win
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I hooked up with a lesbian tonite. Top 2 valentines experiences of all time.
I have a terrible feeling that I made out with a fraternity last night
Sorry I called bc I needed help peeing outside
But I did it
His sister gave me the "if you hurt him I will break your neck" talk. I didn't know how to tell her we're not a couple.
Hey
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GODDAMNIT WHY AM I MISSING THIS
It's okay to admit that you're into redheads.
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