If I had a nickel for every time I've used a condom, I'd have... two nickels.
I'm stoned and have been watching so many cartoons that I changed the channel and real people were on, and it scared me
Also, just saw a kid in a gorilla costume being questioned by a boardwalk cop. I love ocean city.
I don't know what he did but now I'm terrified of mustache rides and it's only movember 3rd
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
it's only monday and im already failing all my classes. i give up. tequila tuesday is my only friend.
Dude. Get me out of here. I'm surrounded by glitter-faced 40 year olds in halter tops. The desperation here is so thick you can taste it.
Bring beers. The password is "I brought beers" but you can't come in if you're a liar
THEY HAVE VIAGRA FLAVORED GELATO
Don't you judge us. Sockets make ideal bowls
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was woke up by the fucking Star Spangled Banner this morning. I sat up in bed and put my hand over my naked heart. I was so confused
My life hurts
I woke up 30 minutes away from the bar, my car was at a train station, and when I got home all I got was the speechless head shake
Sorry it's taking so long, it's harder to take an ass pic with an iPad than you think
Nothing warms my heart more than the sight of a naked hockey player in my bed.
Due to this morning's events my new porn name is Reepa Nipplov.
Awww I'm so proud! Starting friendships before you hook up!
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