it's business casual sex. like no kissing, shake hands after, occasional frequency
it's fine if we fail the bar, we were never going to satisfy the moral character requirement anyway
you woke me up in the middle of the night to tell me you were taking off your pants and it was not an invitation.
maybe if i keep dancing i won't throw up
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I mean, I know going to rehab probably didn't make her a lesbian, but I can always hope
you wouldn't believe how quickly birth control dissolves in vodka
no, i remember trying to staple my nipples together. I just can't figure out where the hell stapler came from.
True. I'd rather snort cocaine off a homeless guy then work on the weekend...Actually that may not be that bad.
Apparently I yelled "no stop it" in my sleep last night when he tried to cuddle with me.
Oops, guess its official. I just use him for sex.
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Please stop hiding condoms in my house. If I want to have sex with you, I will let you know. FYI, my mom found the ones hidden behind the milk. She was not happy.
So apparently we wrote "Lube Shopping" in Paula's diary on every friday for the rest on the year....
Nope we are at the ER my brothers crazyass neighbor kinda stabbed him in the neck. He's gonna be fine.
I'm not in it for just the sex. If I wanted mediocre dick once a week I would have stayed with one of my exes.
the fact that you beer bonged rum made me so proud, the fact that you threw up an entire footlong tuna melt after... not so much babe
I feel like he doesn't realize we're offering him a threeway with sisters and I don't understand how that's possible.
Maybe we should bring mom next time.
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