I thought you said his peep was too small
it is but i have no money and nothing is on tv until 7 when americas next top model comes on.
We will have to stop frequently for food, stretching legs, interesting things on the side of the road, and sex. So you might as well eat.
I'm at an open mic night and the next act is called 'the best creed cover band ever.' The guy i recently hooked up with is on bass.
i don't think my life will be extraordinarily more meaningful if i let him put his tongue in my butthole.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My grandma had to be escorted out by police.
She looked at me and said "i like penises." and then passed out with her condom balloon animal in her hands.
Even jesus won't love me after tonight. I'm going hard.
Oh thank the gods of upholstery, i thought that was never coming out...
He sent me a vid of himself jerking off. I hope his hands are the size of tennis rackets or it will be a very short date.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't think he cares about your inhospitable uterus.
Dude you're fine. You're 5 minutes away from your house and you're eating fig newtons
I am never drinking with the goths again.
So was this before or after he cried about trump?
After
It was probably the most embarrassing moment of my life. But I had cleavage, so I'm good!
Legit just looked at the gin bottle and said, “Aw fuck, I’m going to feel this in the morning.”
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