I'm not a real person
I'm sorry, everyone knows that
We're facebook friends in real life
i just threw up ON my final. epic way to end the semester.
Hey is it bad when your boss leans over your desk and tells you "you smell like the Rainforest Cafe"??
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
do you guys have 30-35 shot glasses? because if not, i don't even see a point in me coming
My motherly instincts are overcoming my slutty ones
But Monday we'll be living in a post-apocalyptic hellscape. Also, I'm going to a champagne tasting.
I just looked at your pics on Facebook....there was cake? Where the fuck was I!?
Shotgunning beers to finish a midterm project at 3am is a good idea right?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's not a real holiday until someone pees on you. Did someone pee on you?
I just sent you a multitude of sexual pictures...and you responded with a Charles Dickens Quote.
Bianca brought a stripper home he's making me breakfast
What the fuck happened last night.... I woke up with a bowl half full of ravioli next to my head, reversed on my bed still fully clothed.....
We're listening to drake in the middle of the woods and smoking two joints at once...my life is complete.
Something is wrong here. The birds are chirping and I'm not fucking you, I'm not getting head and I don't smell bacon. Why am I up this early then?
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