i seriously hope you fucking die....you are the worst.
SHit! Sorry, sent to wrong person
If you're ever in Seattle we should Fuck. Or get coffee, whatever.
my underwear are soaked with white zifandel yet i have continued to wear them despite the fact im at home
Drinking wine out of an empty soup can and watching spongebob squarepants.. I eveb hate myself
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i've met an abundance of virgins and guys who where flip flops, i thinks there's a correlation
So hungover. I'm getting too old for trolloping around in disco shorts going shot for shot with well behaved underclassmen in an effort to lure them to the dark side of alcoholism and liver failure.
You had sex with a mute, how is that not funny
Props to you. You took the bet seriously. Making out with her for an hour right after she spewed
Are you sure he's still you're boyfriend when you're sober?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Update: drank half a bottle of Bourbon and texted three ex's. Waiting for the roommates to go to sleep so I can raid the fridge.
A real best friend would support the hoe in me. Not remind me of what happened the last time I slept with a boss
Dude, you fell into a tree, and both of the tables, AND the window well... Resilient aren't you?
Dude this weed has me so paranoid.
Yeah tell me about it I just screamed after I coughed because my own cough scared me.
Why did I wake up covered in glitter next to a half eaten cheeseburger?
I need some buff guys to cuddle me and call me precious
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