You know if a vagina was a face, it'd be ugly as hell...
conclusion of the day: americans need to get on tredmills, people need to learn how to flush toliets and learn how to pee in then instead of on them, and waiters shouldnt tell their life stories to customers.
the black eye was caused by a 12 year old girl in a vampire costume who punched you in the face after you aggresively screamed "TEAM JACOB!" in her face & howled at the moon...
I still can't believe he turned down that threesome with us in central park. He must be really committed.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He chipped a tooth on the first beer. You know the night is just going to be a slushy mess after that.
Yes. Be the home wrecker you've always dreamed of being.
There is a pile of hair outside the apartment next door. At least now I know what all that shouting was about last night.
How can I politely yet provocatively ask you for a cock shot?
Thats just a parental red flag. They have been brainwashed. Lets baptize them into the church of PBR
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
please come here right now, that girl who always gets her boob out is here and she brought taco bell
Just get over here and light metaphorical fireworks in my literal vagina
All I've done today is nap, eat candy and get off from my vibrator. I didn't know it was possible to be THIS single.
She puked off the side of the cruise ship onto a newlyweds balcony table and they watched it all happen then they made her clean it up
Definitely the only person to buy 2 handles a 2 bottles of champagne & 3 thirties while wearing a fanny pack
Did you really have to freak out and get up half way through to put the cat in the closet?
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