i jus seen this fat chick walk buy look like she had don king coming out her arm pits..
forecast for tonight is alcohol, low standards and poor decisions.
i'm telling everyone you had sex with a puerto rican drug lord
He said he only talked to me because I talk dirty in bed.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I couldn't even finish, she was lounder and more annoying than DJ Khaled
How do u explain cocaine to a 9 year old?
The only thing the cop asked me is..... "how are you still alive"?
He wants to know how I lost my bra in his pants....id like to know too
I am nonfunctional stoned. I had to ask ben to put me somewhere away from all the people I'm sitting on someones bed watching a wall. Not alright. Should not have come.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My flask has coffee in it for finals week.. So that's responsible right?
I told him I was going to sit on his face after I got out of the shower, he threw up the arm boners and yelled "STEVE HOLT!!" I might actually stop sleeping with other dudes.
I was full on naked standing in his room and I just said "this isn't me" and left.
We tried to do sophisticated last night, but our low class kept shining through.
Is this like a preordered booty call?
So the bar crawl I'm on is a "90s bar crawl" and I made the joke about a few overweight girls that "lack of concern for your weight is so 90s" it did not end well
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