great time with ya sorry i wasn't one of the three guys you wanted to stay with
called my therapist. she asked if I was sad bc of m.j.'s death. are ppl that pathetic?
you need more empathy. some people get depressed for reasons OTHER than being a whore.
i just carried on a conversation with my mother from another room mid-ejaculation. you would have done the same
Sorry about all the noise last night. We were trying to break bottles by kicking soccer balls at them. If it's any consolation, there's shattered glass and blood all over my kitchen.
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girl is pretty boring. i'm gonna see if she'll let me finger her.
You don't understand how difficult it is to give head with cotton mouth
I woke up under a table, with a huge Mexican sombrero, a box of 120 doughnuts and a bloody nose. It all screams success.
the best sex is "duke just lost" sex.
I'm gonna go to bars and pick up women hopped up on democracy.
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I'm happy in my shell. My shell which consists of keeping guys in the friend zone and me masturbating...
whose parrot is this?
Yes. He better. Or I will shave a penis into his beard while he sleeps.
So his dick was definitely bigger than it looked in all the pictures he sent my daughter.
He told us a story about a time his 80 year old uncle karate chopped a dick in a glory hole.
last time we tried to watch a movie together, we ended up having really aggressive sex. during the Lion King. so what Disney classic will we be ruining this time?
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