I just got stood up by an 18 yr old. fmylife.
its summer. and we all know college gfs do not count in summer.
college gfs dont count ever. theyre like getting corn rows in jamaica. you feel cool at the time. then you go home and people make fun of you.
You told him your wedding ring was part of your costume. not okay!!
k so who do I think I'm kidding applying to culinary school? I just fucked up a microwaveable pizza
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I answered the my mom's phone call about what we're doing for father's day while he was still fucking me. She thought I seemed really excited about his hiking boots present.
The night was going well until I found tufts of my hair in the freezer. Then I got nervous
I'm not upset because i like you. I'm upset because I can't use you for the sex anymore.
I hope after we constantly bang for 2 days straight we can agree to be friends again
When you turn your data bak on you're gonna get a pic of a nipple but it's not mine
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Face washed and sleeping pill taken. Here's hoping for a more sex filled tomorrow.
i just hope we're both dead or in prison at the same time
I've lost every trace of self esteem. Even sneaking a BJ in the coffee room has lost it's luster.
It's official. I have spent more money on weed than on textbooks this semester.
You guys do the cocaine and I'll do the dishes.
Dear god my vagina.
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