Send those Picts to my email please. From last night
Ps thx for the porn on my phone
;) ur welcome
I really like you and I'm tired of just hooking up. I want you be my boyfriend.
Uhh, I'm not breaking up with my girlfriend to be with you.
Tell me why I'm at Target and this entire Spanish family is crowding around the condoms questioning which ones they should get
i don't understand how she was down there for so long, she's like a mermaid, a blowjob giving mermaid.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just went back to the bar and asked if they found a shoe last night.
i need to find a notary that isn't going to turn me in for blatantly lying to the us and chilean governments
I was fucking trucked by the swat team last night on State Street after UK won. But I got a picture with the guy afterwards so I forgive him
I was so high I didn't realize I'd put on someone else's bra. I thought my boobs had shrunk.
I air guitared a man's prosthetic leg on the bar to Bruce Springsteen. That's how it's going
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I asked my boyfriend if he wanted a bong for his birthday but he instead asked for corndogs
the cheaper the better
Hopefully they won't bring up last year's Christmas party. I kind of predicted my great aunt's death...
I appreciate the fact that you sent me a snapchat of your dick soaking in a cup of water.
Weight watchers just said "you've tracked beer three times recently, want to make it one of your favorites?" I'm begining to understand why I needed to go in the first place.
I just split a tacobell party box with my boss. 12 tacos. We were equals for a moment.
I was watchin a porno and I sware I saw that dude at the bar at applebees the other night
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