Just be blunt and say drink from my dick
I'd rather watch my mom take a shit while reading the sunday new york times than watch mama mia .
If my vag had twitter, what do you think it would say?
if you don't start talking to me i'm gonna tell your gf that you said she tastes bad
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who knew "i drink your milkshake" would work as a pickup line
well at least you didnt have sex with him. i feel like a proud mother. you always have sex with them.
I blacked out after the shots of canned lobster bisque.
I stopped in the middle of puking to wish you a happy birthday, so by default it means a lot.
Drag queen told me that I have the cheek bones to do drag. That's supposed to boost my moral.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i feel like the wall was a canvas for his penis.
thanks for the bloody nose. you probably dont remember, i'm not mad.. only because your boobs are to blame
He let him chew on his fu man chew. The man has the patience of a saint
He washed his dick in my kitchen sink after sex. I think he might be a keeper.
Do you think you could cook pancakes while i blow you?
I'm not going to drink anymore, and on that note I'm not going to drink any less either, so I'll see you there. . .
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