Just woke up naked in my storage cubby and some one rearragned my whole room?
no jk, not my room
i just walked in on him masterbating..to a picture of me. that definitely has to be true love.
She needs to learn she only fits into our friendship as a DD.
doing a walk of shame covered in blue food coloring is only embarrassing if you make it embarrassing...actually no its embarrassing on all accounts
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
At one point, the guy you were fucking high-fived with the guy I was fucking. We should hang out with them again?
he threw up in a solo cup, then washed it out and used it to play flip cup. Im not sure if thats resourceful or disgusting.
She just broke into my apartment while I was asleep, woke me up and drunkenly tried to seduce me for about 2 minutes, then passed out..
I was so high I didn't realize I'd put on someone else's bra. I thought my boobs had shrunk.
I wouldn't know what to do. You never really mentally prepare for a cactus getting thrown at your face.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sweet! It'll be a "that-minor-I-used-to-serve-alcohol-to-is-no-longer-a-minor" party!!!
I'm to the point of desperation where I stare at customers penis imprints through their pants all day
I'm sorry about the spring break comment. I won't make anymore pornos, I promise.
Well I'm trying out this whole "not sleep with a stranger thing"
That's silly... just silly. And by silly I mean unrealistic.
I’m going to cut back. New Year, New Me
I would never wish less dick on anyone but do what you gotta do
After 3 parties, all of them busted, and 4 field sobriety tests, I AM the cop whisperer
Randomize