Sarah Palin just quit. Happy Independence day!
God Bless America!
$1 pitcher night should be outlawed.
Dude she's on meds. He has a ginormous penis. Ur A dumbass. That concludes our feelings chat. Dim Sumday?
its official: beach shits are the exact same as mountain shits
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Today's been pretty great, I went and bought the new Batman for the sole purpose of masturbating to Bane
And the next morning he asked me why I had clothes on so I said so that he could take them off again.
Reasons I shouldn't drink... My twitter drafts keep getting more and more emotional.
She just left someone a voicemail saying 'you better not have plans Saturday night, cause I'm going to sit on your face.'
I told my coworker that I'm going to a dinner party and was asked to bring wine and pregnancy tests and he was like.. I miss being 20
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I need to go home for the safety of everyone in a 10 mile radius, especially me
I just got promised sex at a fire station tonight so basically all my porn star dreams are coming true.
He lives in a tent in my ex'd backyard. Why the fuck would you want any of that dirty dick?
all I know is that I was naked, and there were cheeto puffs everywhere...
You ran the halls of the dorm naked handing out condoms. You were the sex fairy. Best you can do if you're not getting laid.
He sent me the milestone first dick pic this morning, it looked like a baby's fist holding a tree trunk. I'm frightened and aroused in equal measure.
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