Would it be horrible to send my ex's girlfriend an email telling her that I sexed her man up so dirty that he fell asleep inside of me afterwards?
i wish swine flu would become a total pandemic so we cld be rid of all the people that are complaining about it
There's an amish chick decked out in amish clothes on a cell phone staring at me.
Just got back from my 9:00 am class to find my roommate soaking her lifesaver gummies in vodka so she can have them for a snack in class later.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She was so wet my fingers were literally pruney when I got done with her
I have to have sex with him again. I feel like I need to train him so no other girl experiences that bad of sex.
I booty called her while she was in labor.
Can't. I took a Viagra to make sure I wouldnt leave the room so I might actually study.
I'm not a home wrecker but if one more married man with a yacht asks me to go scuba diving I'm NOT saying no
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
there's still three solo cups of your puke in my basement. so that needs to be solved at some point.
She just mixed her Emergen-C with champagne... Vegas here we come!
I just sent you a multitude of sexual pictures...and you responded with a Charles Dickens Quote.
fries before guys. food before dudes. shakes before dates. chips before dicks. lemon bars before football stars. macaroni before screwin' tony. what i'm saying is please come to ladies' night
Can you leave her a note saying "did you enjoy watching me fuck your roommate?"
I will.
Alone, in the dark, eating tacos and drinking vodka. Who's apartment is this?
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