Oh man dude like 1000 to 1500 milligrams. Its gonna burn like bad though.
Feel like bed is flying. Not sure where we're going. Hope there is candy.
As payment for all the times you have babysat me while im drunk, im giving you the shorts i stole from the guy i stayed with on friday night. They're clean. Come get em.
I'm not upset because i like you. I'm upset because I can't use you for the sex anymore.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I forgot my id and a man called soup is buying me vodka.
I can feel myself smiling like 10 minutes after I stop smiling, and that's just like... so awesome.
rigging a system to keep my jello shots cold in class. important election day work.
We couldve played the bring a random boy to lunch game but i made him go home
I woke up half naked on the floor next to his bed, and his cat was staring at me like it had seen everything that i myself don't remember..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Do you think it's wrong for me to hop on that dick before he realizes that he's gay?
I'm just checking to make sure you don't want to go to the farmers market... This is an assumption based on the fact that you were slapped with a sandwich last night and you remained unconscious.
I don't WANT a sex disease! Especially one assigned to me by my supervisor..
she's throwing knives it scares me
update: broke ceiling. glass everywhere
You know you gave a quality blow job when you have to ice your neck and jaw the next day.
My theme for the night was drink diego drink! Unfortunately Dora was not there to navigate me to the bathroom
Randomize