I think I just saw someone hide a body.
Luol and I just scored with two 40 year old married chicks. They dropped us off on the way to soccer prctic. The kids in the back were confused. Call me.
Did you know that cab drivers don't take quarters for payment? They don't even like it when you ask.
I will make out with the first guy who tries to pick me up with a lyric from a rap song. I won't even reply, just be on him like whoa.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I wonder what gingers are like in bed...as awkward as their hair or just as unique as it...?
remember to ask your mom about the name of her pet duck so we can name the bowl
I'm more concerned about the fact that I can't feel my gums
I don't know what you're talking about but its dick galore in the tub. We will be getting poked tonight. Bring forks.
It's like she can't drink without using a flambongo
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
as much as i want to say no i cant cause i need the trophy wife training
We could get her a gift basket of Xanax l
I just found those cheese sticks in my purse. Along with a handful of confetti.
Did you actually just quote Ace Ventura during a sext!?
You know it
Dammit now I have to marry you
I just used my sisters cheerleading plaque and a children's book to crush up painkillers to snort. Happy Friday
Never let the horse trainer ride you, always ride the horse trainer. I have huge bruises on my thighs from his hip bones. That's how hard he rode me
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