shit pants at work. discarded underwear.
just showed this text to the guy at west elm. luckily we did not stool ourselves in the midst of the ensuing hilarity. so you're commando now?
yep! most awkward part is that i was a few feet away from a client, talking and looking him in the eye. i've never stooled while looking someone directly in the eye.
My tally is now official: I have been drunk every weekend since 2008. Cheers.
Heating the house with the oven may not be safe but at least it's always preheated
she just made some guy spank her... then made some chick take a running start and spank her.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It wasn't random sex though, it was almost a relationship, built on lies and sex
She called picking up at 2pm a matinee drug deal.
I've never felt so inclined to grow a dick. THIS is what the gays in this town have done to me
I just shotgunned a beer alone in the bathroom...what do you expect from me
bark. im thoroughly looking forward to kegs and eggs. next weekend should be pancakes and pinnical, then cereal and seagrams and then whiskey and waffles.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Shitshow foam night was such a success
Your level of morning after guilt is too much right now. Do less.
I don't need to marry the guy. I just need some filthy, shameful wish fulfillment sex and then live out the rest of my life on the bean farm.
If I could drink as much and have the amount of sex he has at his age, well I'd probably be dead
And to be fair, I think we all suspect that forbidden sex with an outlaw biker might be worth it.
There's no triumph quite like finally banging your high school boyfriend 6 years later
Randomize