dude sorry about putting my finger in your butt last nite i was wasted and thought it was mine
yeah. and then it was like the room of requirement. the elevator just opened for our threesome.
no seriously. she's even got the premier of the real L word on her calendar at work. that lesbian.
I blacked out after the shots of canned lobster bisque.
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Memorial weekend is going to be amazeballs. Jungle juice, drunk guys, and my vagina being stimulated by the vibrations of a 4 wheeler. I mean there is no way that can go wrong.
I knew he cared when I got his text "happy birthday to the girl who gives phenomenal head"
he also bled all over my floor. unrelated to cats but true nonetheless.
Oh aight, and i was just going to be content with drinking, beating off and watching ninja turtles
I'm not sure drinking my way through west nile virus is the best idea. Oh well, already committed to that plan.
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HOW DO I ALWAS FIND THEM?! THERE WAS BE A SOCIETY OF SMALL PENISED MEN AND I MUST BELONG TO IT!
I lost the back to your old name tag last night in a girls shirt. It got me a view of some titties though, I guess in some way you're still doing your brotherly deeds
On a scale of 1 to 10 how concerned should I be
Stop it with the monkey emojis. It's like sexting with Curious George
Sooo i'm debating posing nude for the drawing and painting classes, I just wanna see if they draw my nip ring.
There's glitter all over his bed from my Pink VS panties... I think I might invest in similar styles as a way of marking my territory just incase.
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