soo I had sex last night and he wore a condom, pulled out sans condom. we looked everywhere and couldnt find it, even in my vag. so Im in the library at school and I googled it and it gave me "gentle digging" techniques, and sure enough, found it. ew. I'll be purchasing Plan B after class.
got a scholarship and a hot psych teacher. hello spring 2010
Somewhere at this very moment, a group of drunk white girls are singing dont stop believing.
He says he quit drinking. I'd like to have a moment of silence for losing the best drunken hookup ever. We will build a memorial to his awesome cock.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just wanted to share with you that my life has come to naked arts and crafts, to fix my flask, with a rum and coke in my hand... Good luck on your exam
The last bar we left there was a sausage stand right outside and I apparently felt bad those guys were working that late, so I bought a $9 sausage, gave it to some drunk kid and said "I support local businesses!!" I'd say I've done my civic duty.
Ummmm you know you're drinking vodka out of a Skittles bag, right?
My parents woke me up at noon to tell me my maid had found my clothes strewn all over the neighborhood
I'm eating hummus off of my stomach right now.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He sent me a blank text message. That's a booty call waiting to happen
We drank vodka and koolaid through a traffic cone. It got rowdy.
I'm too depressed to masturbate. This election is the worst.
First time a guy goes down on me and his dog had its head on my knee the whole time. I swear it was judging me.
No idea who's grandma but people were just running around naked
I ripped ass in on and around her face during a hard 69. I don't think she'll ever call me again.
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