So today I found out that our school is known as the herpes school
anal on a first date. tsk tsk.
WTF?! TAYLOR SWIFT JUST WON ARTIST OF THE YEAR OVER MICHAEL JACKSON?! WHAT IS THIS WORLD COMING TO?!
I think I should have my paycheck direct deposited to the bar
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
u were so high that u chewed on candle wax for an hour
so i gave him head in the movie theater last night. thought we were alone til I heard the clapping from the other side of the theater after he'd finished.
She either was great at sex or I finished the whole bottle of svedka my self
I think the multiple Sunday morning sirens outside my window are a plot by the cops to get back at me for the shit we pulled last night. Or I should move to a better area.
Tequila me may have very bluntly told him that I wanted to touch his abs.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I spent $31 at mcdonalds last night. Threw my nuggets all over the yard, ate them out of the snow, picked a fight about it, vomited, then passed out.
Naked.
Wikipedia just saved you three hours and $30 on a bar tab. You should donate.
$5. Donated.
i need some fresh meat. meat that has a license and a job and isn’t a FULL-blown alcoholic. partial i could tolerate, bc, haha, let’s be honest, me likey my drinkies.
Last night when we banged she had nothing else on but socks that said 'property of Jesus' on them.
I cannot take an uber back in my costume...can you please come get me?
I'm sitting in the car vaping at an elementary school to try and deal with the stress of existing. About how i thought being 30 would go for me tbh
Randomize