She gave him HEAD floating down the river in a tube as big a a tire. I just don't know how to compete with that sort of level of slut.
There are regrets in my world today- mostly jager at that fucking altitude
Sorry I kept grabbing your vagina at the casino. I believed it was my lucky unicorn to win bonuses
We should celebrate the resignation of Berlusconi tonight with too many bottles of wine and sambuca. We're allies, right?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Terrible hangover + phoenix airport + pizza hut....I think I might have entered one of the levels of hell.
He stood me up and then his cat died. I feel like this is Gods way of saying he's on my side, even after the tequila fiasco.
i love how you just walk into that dealer's house every time without knocking, yet you don't even know his name
We got to his house, cuddled while watching game of thrones, then fucked during the repeat airing.
I'm like a freaking volcano of life and sexual frustrations
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Stories. There's stories.
MEGHAN YOU'VE BEEN THERE FOR 20 MINUTES
TFW YOU ACCIDENTALLY SEND A MEME ABOUT LIKING ANAL TO THE GROUP CHAT. JESUS FUCKING CHRIST, WHAT IS WRONG WITH ME?
before i could order beers she was on stage 69ing with a stripper
So, I just found out Ireland, is #1 in binge drinking. I know its Sunday but this one is for America.
My arm is completely dead, never again will i give you a 20 minute hand job. You better have enjoyed that asshole. I have to text with my left hand now.
I'm literally watching a webcam of the Vegas strip right now and it is making me sad.
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