that's just what I need...drunk ass people throwin hatchets in the dark.
that was the first time i tried it. why is it all sticky? its like somebody threw a glue bottle at my face.
and then some norwegians asked us to be in their porno.
Had to awkwardly dig through all my fake ID's to get my real one so I could vote.......Model citizen over here.
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This is how I ended up being the slutty friend isn't it?
Its like the unofficial aniversary of the loss of her virginity. And I will be giving tours of the spot they did it in and showing how I'm serious when I say the grass doesn't grow there anymore.
This is the weirdest negotiation ever.
This is what happens when two people with zero shame try to argue.
Ok here's the state of the situation: We're alone in a strange city with strange people with nothing but alcohol and sprite, I think we're gonna make it.
a pizza costume came into my possession last night. needless to say i showed up to his house wearing only the pizza, shouting "delivery" into his window.
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His water bottle is sitting on my coffee table like a monolith dedicated to the things he is not doing to my vagina.
The security deposit's gone, let's trash this motherfucker
I made out with a dude last night who has an ex wife. Is this what post grad life is about?
So do I get to ride the beginning of the November stache or what?
I should've left when he told me that he only smoked crack by accident once
I wonder how drunk we can get before Christmas Caroling turns into trespassing.
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