he looks like a really good dad on facebook
i just realized the only form of arm exercise i get is holding my arms up in the stand up tanning booth
Went from beach to class to bar all while wearing my swimsuit as pants. Clearly I'm dressed for success.
Um I think everyone drunk and there's some douche on violin.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
hes the hot one from work who thought i was dead after my party
I only put bad things in my body...jack, caffeine, chocolate, pills, and rich's cock. It's like being holistic but exactly opposite
You remember that guy i fucked in Ireland who stopped in the middle to talk about why he had 8 pillows on his bed? Yeah he's following me on twitter...
Thank god I didn't get free from the hospital restraints. I wouldent have lasted long drunk, startled and in an ass-less gown In D.C.
Wanna show up on a guy's doorstep and punch him in the balls for me? At least this one isn't a cop.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
mom is telling me the setting in which I was conceived
did you know we used to have a pool?
He was asleep with his head on a windowsill and you were petting his head, then you almost left the kitchen and then went back to pet him some more.
Last night was like blooper reel sex. He dropped me!!
Masturbated while waiting for my face mask to dry, so it was a productive night.
We broke into a construction site had sex on a scissor lift and realized it was a church...tomorrow again??
there is definitely a hickey on my left nipple.
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