Crown is evil. It plays hide and seek with my morals
So there are ramen noodles in the shower you need to explain...
okay I'm thinking he doens't have a facebook...I'm on page 28 of Hunters
ok you need to stop NOW
a guy in a toll booth on I-90 told me to fuck off for not being a red sox fan. i am going to miss massachusetts very much.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Seeing Harry Potter 3D stoned: Pro- giant redheads w/cute accents. Con-weeping for stoners who only had Pink Floyd laser shows.
you'll never guess what i found when i got home...
a cake, in the toilet
sometimes i wish i was a boob, they get to chill in soft and cuddly little cup things.
Drinking wine out of an empty soup can and watching spongebob squarepants.. I eveb hate myself
Blood. All over. Pre coke adventure needs to slow down unless I'm involved
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is it rude if I ask the current tenets of our future apartment if I can come and blackout for a night? I want stupendously drunk me to get a feel for the place so he's comfortable when we move in.
He gave up on mugging us when Dave wouldn't stop laughing. He was wiggling his finger at the knife and making baby noises and giggling. The guy just walked away.
For public speaking we have to bring an object that describes us to class. Can't decide if I wanna bring a flask or a shot glass.
I don't want to be Eskimo brothers with your dad
He woke me up at 6:30 to have sex again and afterwards, he didn't even judge me when I asked him if he wanted some rum. I think I found my soulmate.
i asked your drunk ass where the fuck you were going and you screamed “WENDY’S BITCH”.
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