Raise your hand if you bought 2 annoying girls shots of water. CLOWNS.
Spotted at kelly concert- 10 year old in a homemade "I do not hook up" t shirt. Well I should certainly hope not, sweetheart.
My entire floor is waiting for the couple to come out of the shower. She's a screamer. We've blockaded them
I don't understand how she could dump me AFTER we had shower sex. I'm fucking great at shower sex
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There are apples in the microwave and a cup of twigs in the fridge. I think she's hiding in the pantry, I can hear her giggling. Leaving her to it.
He turned off the music when i walked in and introduced me to everyone. then they gave me jager and made me chug it while holding a giant purple dildo. everything resumed when i finished
I'm just pissed at the whore who takes over my body when I'm blacked out.
I was just laying in bed wondering if there's more important things in life than cheese stuffed pretzels.
Breakfast Clubbing as Juggalos. I can feel our IQs in freefall.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And know that if I ever text "road head?" that it comes from a place of caring and not a place of heartlessness..
Do the molecules within bourbon change when mixed with a cola to form a superior liquid treat?
Also I know you probably did not understand anything I said on the phone last night but thank you for pretending.
Hey I’m obsessed with Charlie Heaton from stranger things...not because he got caught at the border with coke...okay that’s a lot of it
you were so drunk that when the mouse on your laptop didnt work anymore you decided to just take it into the bathroom and pee on it while laughing like a mad scientist.
I accidentally just texted my dad asking if he wants to do shrooms with me. Do I leave the city now or...
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