i woke up under my mattress pad with him laying naked next to me and his wwjd bracelet on my nightstand.
nice, that's exactly what jesus would do.
i cant remember past the part when we filled his tub with skittles.
you thought you were invisible so you started narrating your actions.
It smelled like mall pretzels. Of course I investigated.
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She just called to say she can support a full bottle of vodka between "the girls" now. I'm going over, don't try and stop me.
not a day goes by that I don't wish you were here or I there. Today it was because I had the desire to get high and go look at the jellyfish at the aquarium and you're the perfect buddy for that.
I'm having a martini with dinner. A new level of class.
I'm stoned and eating mustard, also a new level of class.
We set around a table in a hotel room and he spoon fed Molly to everyone there... I felt sketch for sec but then... Oh well.
i need some magic done to my vagina
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I'm still hammered too. I started tweeting the time at one point I'm pretty sure.
& he told me that I give the best head ever.. like can I get that on a medal?
My joke about liking my coffee like I like my men IS ABOUT TO COME TRUE.
This kid wants me to stop partying. Like I have only known you for 5 days. Chill.
Its 6:30pm and dad just drunk called me asking me what the alarm code at home is..... I'm at home, and dad isn't here.....
She was blowing air into green onions and tying knots in them to make "balloons"
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