she looks like stephen colbert with that blond wig he was wearing last night.
5 Four Lokos being cheaper than a case should be illegal.
i have wind burn on my face from my head hanging out the window of the cab vomitting
Friends bring friends secret work margaritas. my pink water bottle is in the cupboard
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The fire breather is here so I may get my second wind.
Thats gotta be it. Also just found out that the fireworks will fit in the airsoft pistols...we are all gonna die
She sucked my dick and I swear I almost had to send a search party into her mouth to find it. IT WAS THAT AMAZING.
Some dude peed on tonys floor because drunkness
They offered him a bucket as he was peeing and he was like "Nah, I'm good"
All I remember is while we were making out M.A.A.D City came on so I pushed him off of me so I could rap along.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We trekked into the state forest, laid the comforter down and he proceeded to tell me that we could stay here and stargaze, turned me around and fucked me like the lion king.
Just got home, my brothers stoned and he got a high score on COD.. He just asked me if I wanted to have a celebrational yogurt with him. Wtf?
I'm so sorry to hear about your grandmother. Also how many grams are in an eighth?
Accidentally drunk dialed my mom last night. Started the conversation with "Where you at girl?"
He woke up from being passed out on the couch mumbled something that sounded like "Taco" then proceeded to the bathroom only to pass out again, I think we need to learn how to party like him!
Someone drank my pedialite!
YOU drank your pedialite. I watched you chase shots with it!
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