Dude, I would hit that so hard that whoever could pull me out would become the king of England
she asked me if I wanted a handjob on the haunted mansion ride at Disney. was I suposed to say no?
Registered for next semester classes drunk. Let's hope I didn't accidently sign up for history of dinosaurs again...
He def has a gf... But hes 7 feet tall and that superceeds any morality I may have.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
His beard is glorious and he smells like barbecue. Introduce me to him.
In a min. With a stripper at the hospital. Business. Not pleasure.
It's not slutty if it's for workout purposes...right?
He won't sleep with me again until I commit...
Run. There is other dick in the sea, less clingy dick.
I woke up at 6am to a knock and a naked guy at my window.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Spring Fling is on 420. The theme better be 'Flower Child'.
I want there to be fog machines and unicorns.
I sold him an eighth while trippin balls wearin my girlfriends tutu and tube top. and i was talking about albinos the entire time
well, he defiantly picked the right guy to buy drugs from
The Winnie the Pooh costume was great until you got drunk and started yelling at the kids asking for pictures.
I mean honestly, I love naps like Anthony Weiner loves sending dick pics
I dont remember you getting a condom thrown at you. I think I had a concusion
At what point did i decide poptarts, nyquil, and whiskey was a good idea?
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